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How to Fix Your Inner Dialogue Around Launching

Jan 14, 2020

Have you ever gone into a group program launch thinking… “This is the launch that will help me to finally be able to leave my 9-5 job, or hire that nanny, or project manager”? The problem with this line of thinking is that so much meaning goes into the launch that it creates a pressure cooker for your launch to have to perform. That pressure can cause you to actually underperform. This article is going about how to fix your inner dialogue around launching your group program so that you don’t lose your shit when you launch. After working with hundreds of business owners on their launches over the last 5 years, one major thing I discovered is the role your inner dialogue plays in the success of your launch. 

Struggling Coaches Attach Too much Meaning to their Launches

The first thing I notice is that coaches that really struggle, are attaching way too much meaning to their launches. And what I mean by that is, regardless of how well they're doing, the coaches that are really struggling in the launch are the ones that are telling themselves that if this launch doesn't go well, then it will mean all kinds of things.

They would say that it will mean that they'll have to go back to a job or that they'll have to do something that they don't want to do in their business. They would even say that it'll mean that they'll have to sell a different program or that nobody likes their stuff or like it can be any meaning that you attach to it.

And I've seen all kinds of stuff. Of course, some are somewhat legitimate. But most are really not legitimate at all. And so anytime that you're attaching any meaning to any launch, those are the things that are keeping you from optimal performance.

So, anytime that you're saying something like I have to do well on this launch because... And whatever your answer to that is, whatever the reasons you're telling yourself are that you have to perform well on this launch, are the very things that are making you not be able to perform. 

Those are the things that are keeping you from optimal performance. Those are the things that are keeping you from being able to thrive, from being able to even show up and serve your audience and really make the impact that you want to. So I would say that that's the very first thing.  

The consequence of Attaching Too Much Meaning to Your Launch

I want you to imagine going through launch after launch like this, whether it be one, two, three, five, 20 launches. What happens is no matter how much you grin and bear through this kind of inner dialogue, you will end up in a burn out mode.

And so the consequence of that is completely burning out. And you will be believing the bullshit you're telling yourself. So if you say, well, if I don't do well on this, then I'm going to have to go back to a job, then you’ll actually be creating the circumstances in which you have to return to a job.

I have seen it all in terms of that. And sometimes that's true. And I've seen people do that who are already making like 20, 30 thousand dollars a month. And so it's really not about the money. It's about the inner dialogue that's going on between your ears.

And so it's important for you to really examine what that inner dialogue is so that you can work through it. And that's really what not losing your shit is all about. It's not about the actual numbers or what's happening mathematically during the launch. 

It's about that inner dialogue that is draining your energy. It prevents all the energy you’re putting into the launch from supporting your peak performance during the launch.

So I wanted to write this blog post for you so that you could come back and read it and really be like your own inner detective. If you're saying I have to do well on this launch because..., that is the magical words that I want to trigger you to remember this blog post and say shit, what am I attaching this to? What am I making this mean that is really hindering me right now?

So that's the first thing. It’s really that awareness and understanding that any attachment that you're creating is all a figment of your imagination.

Wrong Money Mindset

Now you may be like, yeah, but it's really true. Like, I really won't have the money, blah, blah, blah. And I want you to remember back to when I did Make The Money You Deserve Bootcamp. And I was talking a lot about how you are an unlimited creator of money and wealth and income.

And so if you believe that and truly ground yourself on that you will manifest money.  You will realize that just like you can manifest money in a launch, you can manifest money outside of a launch. 

You can sell all kinds of things. You can do a down-sell and you can do an upsell. We have a guide in one of my programs. It shows you other ways that you can recover after a launch. So you could still make your goal.

There's an infinite number of ways that you could make money. Money is abundant and everywhere. And you need to have empowering thought before you can be able to receive that abundance.

But as long as you keep telling yourself that the only way you can do it is through this launch. And this launch has to do it. And this launch has to be it. That's not going to allow you to think creatively out of the box, which is ultimately going to be many times more lucrative because it's using your imagination and your higher self.

So that's number one. It is really like that warning, catching yourself in that state. 

Give Yourself Time and Space

Secondly, one of the biggest differences I see between coaches that struggle and coaches that do very very well on their launches are not just the detachment from meaning. They also give themselves the time and space.

And again, this goes back to if you believe that you can create money on demand. Ultimately, if you're an entrepreneur you can.

 If you can believe that, then it really doesn't matter if you do it from this launch or in another way. And it doesn't matter if you do it in one week or in two months.

And so when you believe in your financial and your money-making abilities, you'll be able to trust yourself and give yourself the time to plan and execute on launch in a way that's not rushed and reactive and last minute. So what I see as a negative pattern for struggling coaches is that they'll say, shit, three clients are ending this month. I have to do a launch.

Then they'll put themselves into a launch situation but don't have the time planned out or the time to plan the launch and to execute well on the launch. And so they're scrambling, getting all these assets together.

 Sometimes they are just doing the launch for the very first time and not knowing how well those will perform. It’s kind of throwing spaghetti at a wall and hoping that something sticks. 

And that's just not the way to launch in a way that is going to be graceful and loving on yourself and really from that place of abundance and grounded. So, giving yourself that space and time to launch is huge. And it's one of the difference makers between some of my clients who are doing multiple six-figure launches and ones that are just like barely scraping by. So that is the next piece. It’s really giving yourself time to plan and execute on your launch. 

Give Yourself Three Goals

So number one is to completely detach from any outcomes or anything that your brain wants to make up as dependent on this launch and the success of this launch. And number two is allowing yourself space and time that you need to execute and plan out your launch. And number three is giving yourself three goals. 

So this was a very tactical implementation that I did back in late 2015, 2016. After doing very well that year and still beating myself up for the results that I thought I should have gotten that I didn't actually get.  P.S. The cause of most suffering is the space between your own expectation of yourself and then your actual performance. That causes a lot of suffering.

One of my coaches taught me to set three goals: the wimpy goal, which is like, I'm definitely going to hit this goal, the middle of the road goal, and then like  I'm shooting for the stars goal. 

And we always work for the high goal. We always shoot for the high goal. We always invest as though we're going to do the high goal. We always operate as though we are creating a high goal. We're always operating from the high goal, but we are gentle and kind with ourselves and loving ourselves for following through and honoring our word.

So that means in a launch, the most important thing is for you to actually execute all of the parts of the launch that you said you would. So if you said, hey, I'm going to do a challenge launch and that's going to require a pre-launch, the challenge week, and then the post-launch follow up. 

I'm going to send out five emails here, 20 emails there. Whatever it is, it might not be 20. But let's say you come up with the plan and those are the emails you're gonna send and you're going to do X number of social media posts.

Your commitment and your word to yourself, your integrity within the launch is the most important factor of the launch. And so the most important thing for you to manage your brain around is for you to fully execute on what you said you would.

And that's the concept that I teach, which is called Mindset Mastery. And it's all about doing what you said you were going to do and not letting the drama of your brain stop you. 

Your brain can come up with some drama like, oh, well, it's not perfect enough. So I'm just not going to do these emails. Well, it's just not going to work out. So I'm not going to do that. I only have so many people signed up and I wanted X, Y, Z. So I'm just not even going to try anymore.

Mindset Mastery is taking back control over that inner dialogue and saying, hey, I said I was going to execute on this. And that's what I'm going to do. I don't care if there are 20 people in this thing. I'm still doing it.

I'm going to play all out as if there are five hundred. That is a true mindset mastery. And that comes from you learning how to program and work with your brain and manage your inner dialogue to support and become the person that you want to be. 

Ultimately I started this blog post by saying that no matter what goals you set we can use the tactics of setting the three goals. And we're gonna set three goals. And there's going to be one that's very attainable and very doable. And therefore, you will hit your goal.

And what often happens with clients when we start working on mindset mastery is the question that usually comes up like, what's the fucking point? This is when we start working on honoring your word to yourself. You start being in integrity with yourself. And all of these concepts are honestly way more important than the money you will actually make from your launch when we start working on this.

The question that usually comes up at this point is, well, what's the fucking point? What is the point of setting the goal? What is the point of even going for this if the point isn't to make the money? And I know that the money is nice, but it's not why I'm doing this

And the reason why it is still important to set goals and go for it is because of who you will become. You will become a better leader. You will become someone who honors your word. You will become someone who sticks to a plan and who is self-disciplined. 

You will become someone who is grounded, who is persistent, confident. All of those things are things that once you become them, nobody can take them away from you no matter what. And that is why we set goals and we go for it. 

That is why we want to perform optimally in a launch. That is ultimately why we are entrepreneurs who are out there doing the work we're doing and not taking the easy route and saying, hey, I'm just going to get a job, clock in, clock out and be done. It is because we want to achieve the next version of ourselves and grow exponentially.

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 Yes, exponential growth is what's available for you when you get out of your head and have the right checklist for your launch. That is when you honor your word yourself and live in this fully transparent and authentic way. And you are like going for it in terms of your personal development, your growth, and your achievement.

The reason that you want to become a different person. You want to grow as a human and challenge yourself. You want to be able to do the things that seemed impossible before you.

 I think for me, you would have read about my journey or heard it on the podcast of the year that I decided to work on honoring my word to myself. That was one of the years that I grew the most interpersonally.

I always thought I was someone that was good at starting things and I wasn't as good at following through and being persistent and finishing things. And so that year was a year of tremendous personal growth for me.

 And again, it is one of those things that are at the core of your being. That is why we're doing the launch. It's to grow as a human, to evolve as a person, to have a new skill set that we didn't have before.

That's when launching becomes really fun. And it becomes a game instead of something that you're doing to prove to yourself or to prove to somebody of a certain dollar amount. And so that's really how to launch without losing your shit. 

Summary  

Here is a summary of how to lunch without losing your shit. Number one, you want to be completely detached from any outcome that you may have. The way to do this is to hone in and really own the fact that you are an unlimited money-making machine.

 And you are that because you are an entrepreneur who owns a business. A business is an asset and a company that can bring money on demand. That's what a business is. 

Number two, you are able to make money in multiple ways, not just this launch. So do not make the launch mean anything about you, about your personal capabilities, about your business in any way, shape, or form.

Next, you want to set three goals for yourself. You want to set a low goal, a medium goal, and a high goal. And in doing so, you're going to operate as though you're working on that high goal. You want to operate as if you are attaining that goal.

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Next, you want to be very kind to yourself. And your one and singular focus is always to completely honor your word to yourself throughout the launch. So if you said you're going to send out X number of emails, X number of dollars were gonna go into Facebook, X number of leads were gonna be worked on getting generated or reached out to or however, it is you're doing this that that's what you do. 

Next, you want to do it because of who you will become. And this is a deeper conversation because this is really about you performing at a higher level and allowing yourself to show up as the version of yourself who has ways of being that you may have never experienced before.

You may have never seen yourself in this light. And that's the reason that you're doing all of this.

Lastly, I want to say something one of my coaches always said to me which was beautiful and always so insightful, you're either going to get the result that you want in your launch or you're gonna get the lesson you need to get that result. 

And so, so often. We're like, well, it didn't happen. And so this means blah, blah, blah.

And we just, you know, make ourselves feel wrong for whatever results we got instead of asking what is the lesson? What did I learn from this launch?

And you must ask yourself this no matter the outcomes, even if it was a fantastic launch and you hit your goals. 

Like we had a spectacular launch last year. And I wanted it to be a one hundred thousand dollar launch. But it was an eighty thousand dollar launch. And I remember being like it's a hundred percent okay. 

First of all, not complaining because it was a great launch anyways. And number two, what did I learn during this launch? And I learned so much during that launch. And I would never, like beat myself up about any results of any launch ever again, because in doing so, I completely miss the lesson. 

And so for me, that has been the biggest lesson. No matter what the outcome of your launch is, it's there to show you something. But that is only if you're willing to objectively look at everything and not judge yourself for the results. 

Instead get very curious about what happened, about how you performed, about how you might do it better next time. And not from a place of, “I didn't do it good enough”, but from a place of, “I want to become the leader that gets this”. And so that's what I want to leave with you today.

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